food, France, and finances

It's been more than three months now since I began eliminating processed foods, sugars and breads from my diet.  The first few weeks were the most difficult (and, honestly, it is still challenging sometimes)... but the experience overall has definitely been worth it.  I have felt empowered and healthy, truly healthy, inside.  I have lost inches, pounds, and everyone tells me I look much thinner and healthier.  I had no idea that the effects of a healthier diet would be so noticeable, for me on the inside as well as for others on my outside.

Recently, (as mentioned in the post below), I went home to visit my parents for a few weeks.  It was a great respite from the exciting spring we had as a family, being asked by our landlord to move and then told we could stay for one more year (after I packed up half the house).  I also volunteered to be the treasurer for my son's select soccer team (26 boys) after a long deliberation by my son about whether to play select or premier soccer this year.  I also volunteered to take charge of fundraising for my children's elementary school as a member of the PTA executive board, and began attending meetings and trainings.

(My little 4-year old niece took this picture of me during our family reunion.  My face/hair looks crazy but it shows my figure a little bit...)

After my husband took his boards and began his fellowship, I returned home with my kids... against my better judgement, digging my heels in, but fully recognizing that I needed to return to "reality" and my husband (I missed him so much!!).  What I didn't expect was the realization that I had charged an enormous amount of money to our credit card while away.  Our transmission burned up during our 20-hour drive and we spent almost $5,000.00 replacing it in our 2004 Odyssey (I know - not cool, or probably wise!), and because my husband had no income during the month of July, (the fellowship program gave the fellows a month off in order to study for their medical boards), I used our credit card for the month... to live.

The efforts of the last three months to figure out how to overcome my (previous, deeply set) emotional eating habits, to intentionally feed my body and soul, to master my cravings and irresponsible eating, to truly enjoy food but not be controlled by it, all suddenly seemed irrelevant.  The financial stress that quickly crept over me and throughout my being gradually took over during the first two days home... and I began to eat.  Granted I was eating healthy... peanut butter with apples or bananas, walnuts and strawberries on red leaf lettuce, brie cheese on healthy crackers, eggs with tomatoes and pepper jack cheese, homemade black bean burgers, delicious brownies made of walnuts, oatmeal, dates and cocoa, fruit and vegetables, etc. For two days I ate... and ate and ate.  Yesterday by 4:00 pm I was absolutely sick.  I felt awful.  I realized that I had allowed myself to give in to the comfort that food offers, the addictiveness of eating delicious food to satisfy stress and the bodily cravings associated with dealing with stress.

This morning I grabbed a book that I borrowed from my mom's bookshelf when I was there: French Women Don't Get Fat, by Mireille Guiliano.  (I have an fascination with France and always have... I studied French in college and have dreamed of going there (or living there!) ever since.)  It has been delightful to read.  There are so many wise tidbits... like:

To be successful, "...you have to be ready to embrace pleasure and individual happiness as your goals."
"A French woman's secret is mainly in her head.  It is one thing to identify your offenders, quite another thing to manage them."
"Novelty is a powerful distraction.  Choose quality over quantity: pick things in season."
"A walk not only uses calories, it can be wonderfully meditative, clearing your head and making you less vulnerable to eating for psychological comfort."
"Deprivation is the mother of failure.  Any program that your mind interprets as punishment is one your mind is bound to rebel against."
"He (her physician) was telling me to be the master of my pleasures as well as my restraint."
"Three months of discovering new things and getting to know your body better is a kindness to yourself that will continue to be repaid for years to come."

This is one of my favorite parts of the book so far:

"At least half of our bad eating and drinking habits are careless, they grow out of inattention to our true needs and delights.  We don't notice what we are consuming, we are not alert to flavors--we are not really enjoying our indulgences, and therefore we think nothing of them and overdo it.  Perhaps you have given up caring about fashion.  Or trying other new things?  It maybe easy for a wife, mother, and full-time worker to neglect pleasure; perhaps a part of you even thinks it's selfish.  But you must understand there is nothing noble in failing to discover and cultivate your pleasures... You owe it to your loved ones as well as yourself to know and pursue your pleasures.  And since everyone's taste and metabolism are unique, you must pay attention to yourself-- to what delights you-- so you can tailor your system and preferences.  It's a lifelong commitment, but it promises a lifetime of good health and contentment."

I am only half way into the book but I felt that I had to share some of these tidbits that inspired me to step back and evaluate my current psychological health and make a plan for being successful in my desire to live healthily, happily and fully. 

trying to avoid eating sugar... well, except for dark chocolate

I decided last Monday to give up sugar... to eat healthier.  My sister decided to do it long ago (a few months).  Somehow, knowing my own sister had the will-power, discipline, desire to do it, and that she had been successfully accomplishing her goal, made me feel that I could do it also.  I read this article a few weeks ago and was really shaken up: It's the Sugar, Folks.  I was eating a lot of sugar, and my kids were too.  I wanted to change... really... but I didn't know how and my attempt to decrease (not cut out) the amount of sugar in my family's diet only lasted a few days.  "Let's make cookies!" I said after only two days.  But after talking with my sister last Monday, I decided that it was time.  My motivation was powered by the fact that I knew I was not eating healthy, and I wanted (really wanted) to be healthier. 

The first day of "no sugar" was great.  No problems.  A few cravings (especially when my kids were fighting, whining, etc.) but I got through it just fine.

Day #2 was... absolutely horrible!  At one point I was pretty certain that whatever the reason for my new goal, (I couldn't quite remember what it was any more), it was NOT worth it.  Luckily I was driving my kids around to activities and did not have access to any sugar - I would have given ANY-thing for a chocolate chip cookie at one point.

Day #3 was not as bad... only difficult for my children, whom I also determined would cut sugar out of their diets (I told them that we had decided as a family, although it was entirely me who had decided - while my husband was working).  Z almost lost it when we walked past a Cold Stone Creamery.  Well, okay, he did lose it.  We regrouped later while eating some strawberries.

Note: I did decide that I would continue to eat dark chocolate (in moderation, of course).  I discovered recently that it has zinc in it, which aids in the production of progesterone.  That is important!  Too important for me to give up... okay, okay, plus I love it and I need some little sweet thing every once in a while (extremism doesn't really work, I think).  And the kids, or course, get sugar constantly.  A few examples:  E went to a birthday party on Saturday night, ate cake and came home with a goodie bag filled with candy; friends brought a plate of chocolate cookies to our house after church yesterday; Z and C went to a pre-kindergarten Teddy Bear Tea this morning and received gummy bears, Teddy Grahams, and rice crispy square treats; and chocolate cake was offered at an end-of-season soccer party this evening for E (luckily I swept them all out before the cake was cut).  All of this happened within a two day period.  There is sugar everywhere!!  So, I don't think I'm being "mean" as my kids keep saying, for eliminating sugar from our diet at home, because they still get sweets every once in a while.

I just read an article by Mark Bittman, the writer of The Minimalist food column in The New York Times for many years.  The article is titled, Healthy, Meet Delicious.  Here are a few thoughts from his article:

“What’s left to eat? I feel like nothing is safe.”  (I have honestly thought this same thing multiple times during the week.)

"Things are changing, and fast. Only 5 percent of Americans define themselves as vegan or vegetarian, but almost everyone believes he needs to eat better. What does “better” mean? ...much less junk, fewer animal products and more veggies. Could not be simpler."

Bittman concludes with: "...the primary challenge [is] to discover how to satisfy those cravings while staying as best as I can within the boundaries of what we know to be sane, or conscious, or well-informed — call it what you will — eating..."

For some reason I have substituted cheese as a way to satisfy my "cravings" for sugar... but I am not sure if that is actually better?  I don't think so.  I am trying to substitute fruits and veggies but my food bill is going out the roof!  

Day #8:  I have definitely noticed a difference in my body and mind.  It has only been a week but I feel better, everything feels better.  I sleep better, I wake up feeling more energetic, I feel stronger and happier inside, I handle stress better.  

Sugar really is evil, I guess.  Or rather, 'toxic', as it says in the first article (referenced above).  Can you believe that they have found sugar linked with diabetes (irrespective of whether someone is overweight or not) just like cigarettes are linked with lung cancer??  It is mind-boggling!  Particularly when you consider each thing that you, your spouse and your children are eating (and/or are encouraged to eat) - every single day.

Now the challenge is to continue eating healthy, as well as to convince my children of the benefits of eating healthy.  But, seriously, who would turn down a rice crispy treat?  I never would have before this week - they have always been one of my favorites!  But knowledge is power, as is experiencing the benefits of a new habit over and over again.  Hopefully, my kids will start now to make healthy choices in their eating habits - before they get set in their ways, like I am!

I tried not to cook on Thanksgiving

Last week, my husband's family called to give cooking assignments for Thanksgiving dinner. I quickly announced that I would be running a half marathon the morning of Thanksgiving. But, I offered to bring whatever they needed me to. (Secretly I was hoping for things like cranberry sauce, spinach salad, corn, pies, etc.) They asked me to bring mashed potatoes.

Regular mashed potatoes for 19 people. Uhg.

Don't get me wrong - I actually do like to cook. The anxiety stems from the requirement to cook something a certain way. My husband likes things the way they have always been. I asked if we could mash sweet potatoes instead. He said no. I asked if we could mash red potatoes (healthier). He said no. I asked if we could mash cauliflower (it tastes the same). He said no. I asked if we could leave the skins on the potatoes (a tad healthier and, I think, yummier). He said no. So, since I couldn't mix it up a bit, make it a little healthier than the usual mashed potatoes, (which I am not a big fan of, can you tell?), I tried not to think about it all week.

When I mentioned to my mom that I was planning to run the half marathon, she said, "Well, that's one way to show people that you don't want to cook for Thanksgiving dinner." I smiled but reminded her sarcastically that it had not worked. I later realized there was so much truth in that statement - more than I ever could have imagined.

The morning of Thanksgiving came. I had been stuck at home for three days due to the snow/ice/freezing temperatures. (My husband has chains on his car so he can get to and from work.) Unfortunately, the snow storm caused too many problems when it came to traveling for us and our babysitters, not to mention the race running trail was covered in snow and ice, so we decided not to run. I was crushed. All morning I moped around, laying in bed reading and pouting, desperate for any way to escape actually making the requested "normal" mashed potatoes.

Am I so immature?

Eventually, my husband started peeling the huge russet potatoes that he had bought from the store. Then he cut them up, boiled them, strained them, put them into the kitchen aid mixer, added milk, butter, salt and pepper, and put them into a huge bowl and covered it.

Done.

Wow. During those unforgettable moments Thursday morning, I fell in love with him. all. over. again.

I still ended up preparing food for Thanksgiving dinner - but food I was excited about: raspberry banana cream pies (my aunt is famous for these), and poppy seed apple spinach salad. For some reason, I didn't dread preparing these at all. Weird. Very weird.

Here is a picture of a car that slid down our street and directly into the tree in the middle of the island in our cul-de-sac. The weather was incredible this week.

Eating like they Used To

About two months ago, I found a great article in NW Health Fall 2010, (ghc.org), about eating fresh produce. I used to be totally anal about this, but have since deteriorated - a lot. I thought I'd share some things from the article that impacted me enough to make some major changes in my family's eating habits.

Often, produce found in grocery stores has been picked long before it ripens (tomatoes are a classic example). "Fruits and vegetables glean their vitamins and minerals from nutrients in the soil and photosynthesis in the plant's leaves. The longer produce can ripen on the plant, the more vitamin-rich it becomes." Some produce has to ripen (like green beans) but even if picked fully ripe, full of nutrients, the time spent in transit likely depletes the available nutrients. This makes complete sense because freshly grown produce tastes significantly yummier than the alternative.

A study carried out recently by the Neighborhood Farmers Market Alliance stated: "organic produce was often not more expensive at the farmers market."

"Nutritionally, studies show that certified organic produce has essentially the same amounts of vitamins, sugars, fats, and protein as conventional produce." The main difference is that produce with the "organic" label have not been exposed to pesticides and herbicides.

Some local farmers are not certified organic (the process to become so is very expensive), but they still follow the rules of the certification. The article explains that "the only way to be sure of the care, harvest, and handling history of your food is to grow it yourself or find someone who can answer your questions." Talk to the local farmers at markets or produce managers at your local grocery stores.

One way to ensure fresh, locally grown fruits and vegetables on your table is to join a CSA (Community Supported Agriculture). The article sites two websites for local sources for CSAs: Sustainable Table at sustainabletable.org/shop.csa and Local Harvest at localharvest.org.

Since reading this short article, I have been making huge efforts to buy only locally grown or organic produce. It really hasn't been more expensive - but it has definitely been yummier. My kids love vegetables more than ever.

I think food is an important aspect of our lives. It is just silly to think that the food we eat (like Doritos... wow, yuck) doesn't have any lasting effect on our body's physiological makeup. I think it is worth the effort to eat fresh, whole foods as much as possible, every single day.

The difficulty for me is keeping my fridge stocked. We have to run to the store often. This becomes a problem on days like today when a snow storm has completely immobilized us. I guess that's when Doritos may come in handy. Um, no - they are still totally gross and totally nutrient-deficient and full of - hm, I don't know what.

Healthier Snacking

In an attempt to eat healthier, I am trying to eat less white sugar and white flour, (no way I could eliminate it altogether like my sister-in-law).

Here are some additional ideas for healthy eating from Real Simple magazine. Small meals are the new thing; they supposedly help you: stay lean by keeping your metabolism working, avoid snacking on unhealthy temptations, help you get all of your vitamins, and put you in a good mood.

Here is a list of some of their ideas for small meals / snacks (minus some):

Multigrain waffle with fruit preserves, or honey or fresh berries
One inch cube of hard cheese (like aged Gouda), plus four to six dried apricot halves
Small bowl of pureed tomato soup with a dollop of low-fat sour cream
Slices cucumbers and one or two wedges of light swiss cheese
Energy bar containing at least four grams of protein
Three cups of air-popped popcorn sprinkled with dark chocolate shavings
Rye melba toast with low-fat cream cheese and dried cranberries
Apples slices dipped in a tablespoon of almond butter
Two slices of low-sodium deli turkey and a handful of grapes
Handful of almonds mixed with dried tart cherries or blueberries
Small bowl of plain oatmeal topped with fresh berries and a splash of skim milk
Two to four tablespoons of hummus with crudites
Three-quarters cup of shelled edamame
A multigrain cracker with part-skim ricotta and honey
Piece of low-fat cheese, a small peach, and a piece of dark chocolate
One whole-wheat English muffin with peanut butter
Hard-boiled egg with freshly ground black pepper

Is your mouth watering yet?

As I talk with friends, the most difficult aspect of eating healthy is preparing ahead of time. I always eat healthy right after I get home from the grocery store and my fridge is full of fresh fruits and vegetables, delicious 9-grain bread, and yummy cheese. As time passes and I procrastinate going to the store and I end up reaching for and grabbing whatever I can find, usually a granola bar or some crackers. I'm hoping this list will motivate me more. It sounds so easy - and so delicious!