Sunday, September 26, 2010

Is It Stress or Is It Just Life?

I have correctly self-diagnosed myself with shingles, with a little help from WebMD (there's a link to it in one of my sidebars - love it), along with a hesitant and unsure half-confirmation from my medical resident husband.

I said to my husband, "I guess this is normal."
Husband: "What?! What do you mean by normal? This isn't normal."
Me: "For a doctor's wife to get shingles, I mean."
Husband: "Huh? What do you mean?"
Me: "Nothing."

Actually, I don't know if I really have shingles, but, I'm pretty sure. It just makes sense.

Me (to my husband): "I've been feeling a lot of stress lately, so it makes sense."
Husband (to my daughter): "Mommy doesn't have any stress."
Husband (to me): "Why do you think you have been so stressed?"
Me (in disbelief, silent)
Husband: "Millions of women would love to have your life, you have the perfect life. I don't know why you are stressed at all."

At this point, we venture upstairs to look up shingles in his medical school textbooks. Suddenly, we hear a bang from inside the closed door to the bathroom. We all look at each other: me, my husband, and three of our children, our fourth was napping. I jump to open the door, fully expecting some sort of raccoon or squirrel. There on the floor, going through the cupboards under our sink, was our 1-year old son.

Me: "Did you put him in here?"
Husband: "No."
Me: "How long has he been in there?!"
Husband: "I don't know. When did he go in there?"
Me: "I thought he was asleep in his crib!"
Husband: "So did I."
Me: "You mean, you didn't get him out of his crib?"
Husband: "No."
Me: "What?! Then how did he get in here?"
Husband: "I don't know."
Me: "Didn't you put him IN HIS CRIB earlier for a nap when I told you to?!"
Husband: "No."
(An hour and a half earlier.)
Me: "What?! He's been locked up in the bathroom all this time?!"
Husband: "Don't blame me. I was downstairs with you."
Me: "It's no wonder I have shingles!"
Husband: "What is that supposed to mean? It's not my fault."
Me: "Nothing."

Within three minutes, my husband was snoring in bed. I was still worked up, trying not to burn a batch of cookies, mediating a battle between my 5-year old and 3-year old over a cute pink belt that they both wanted to wear, trying to keep everyone quiet so they wouldn't wake up my husband, and changing my 1-year old son's diaper.

Really, it wouldn't surprise me at all if this is shingles. But, the sad thing is, my husband will probably never get it, (and I am not referring to shingles here).


Barb's blessings said...

Roger had shingles about 2 months ago. It's an odd age to get them, I think. But, I understand what would cause you to get them, if that's any consolation. I also get that Jared doesn't understand what the stressors are in your life but the worst comment was "that your life is perfect."

I would have brought everyone in to play while he was trying to sleep and then gone for a walk. You are a saint.

Love ya,


Jamie Lamb said...

He is such a jokester, we all know that it's the dentists who lead perfect lives. :)

I have a friend who's married to a dentist. One Friday evening he came home all ready for a nice weekend (they get those, remember?) when (GASP) he was called back in to work!!! It broke everyone's heart, her children cried, and she was so upset. He probably didn't make it home till...(GASP) 6:45 that evening! He probably totally missed dessert!

Sigh. Perfect lives are so hard to come by these days.

Anonymous said...

I am guessing you probably didn't intend this... but I got really upset for you when I read this post!! If my husband said something like that, I would freak out! (And I have ZERO kids to keep alive!) I would definitely try to sit down with him at some point and explain to him that I do have stresses, even if they aren't the same stresses he has.

Anyway... I am probably projecting a lot of my own stuff onto this post... But stress comes in a lot of different forms. And even a wonderful life can cause stress. And STRESS IS BAD FOR YOU.

Enough ranting...

I hope you feel better soon!

Anonymous said...

I think everyone should have the opportunity to spend a day or 2 in the ER and then you might have a different perspective on how good our lives really are! Yes we still have stress, but at least we are not constantly wondering where our next meal is coming from, what corner we're sleeping on, are we going to be mugged or raped tonight, or how did I end up like this. It just changes your definition of stress and life.

becky @ misspriss said...

I would smack my husband (on the arm) if he told me I had no stress. Thankfully, he realizes how hard I work & that it *is* stressful at times. I hope yours does the same.