Muscles & Strawberries

Last Saturday we made homemade freezer strawberry jam. Hello yummo. (Here is a link to a blog with a delicious and sugar free recipe, and some crazy twists and ideas from another blog.) We bought huge flats of strawberries for almost nothing (we are so loving the northwest), sugar, pectin packets (we just followed their recipe), and containers.

For three whole hours my 5-year old daughter worked alongside her grandmother, her aunt, and me in the kitchen. She stood on a little stool and mashed the strawberries for the entire duration (despite the group of cousins running and playing throughout the house). At one point my 7-year old son tried to take over, but she only let him mash for about 2 minutes, (while she offered tips and grumbled about when he would be done), and then insisted that she retain her position and the cool mashing tool, and he retreated without a fight. We couldn't believe how her attention span, her determination to mash every last strawberry, and particularly her little muscles endured . It was incredible.

I think she is the one who enjoys the jam more than anyone else in our family - although we all feel like we've died and gone to heaven. every. time. we. eat. it.

Seriously, what could be more delicious?

Maybe homemade raspberry jam? We shall see - as are planning to go pick raspberries and make more jam this Saturday.

Oh, yumm.

Oreos and Drive-thrus

Tonight I walked in on my husband eating OREO cookies with my kids. They had poured a huge BOWL of milk and were all dunking together and laughing.

Seriously, what could be better than that?

We are still neck-high with boxes, everywhere we turn. I am glad we are here for at least three years for residency, I don't want to move again for a while!

And another random thought, I am wondering why Jamba Juice places do not have drive-thrus? I would so be there - much more often (I never, ever go now). In fact, I think there should be a lot more drive-thru services, everywhere. I don't think people have moms with small children in mind when they design shopping malls. at. all.

Praise vs. Cash

On a random radio station today an announcer stated that researchers recently found that receiving praise activates the same part of the brain that receiving a cash award does. Interesting, but really, something we already know, right? Positive feedback is powerful - so why is it sometimes so hard to remember that, especially with those that we love the most?

Any advice out there for responding to negative feedback from stressed-out, neurotic, tired, perfectionistic, (yet loving and awesome) physician spouses who consistently receive a lot of negative feedback (and very little praise - well, and cash, for that matter) at work?

So, this is my new goal - to look for ways to genuinely praise everyone around me as often as I can. And now that I know it's like handing people cash gifts, it makes it even more fun.

Father's Day without Dad

My husband leaves tomorrow to bring the moving truck to our new home. We haven't seen him in three weeks, but today, possibly, has been the most difficult day to be without him. He had the mail forwarded last week, and called last night to tell me that our Father's Day gift had not arrived in time.

Ouch.

So, here is a little message for him, the man of my dreams, and the hero of our children.

Even with four children he is such a hunk(!) who is not only TONS of fun and provides non-stop adventures and excitement in our lives...

 ... but is also constantly providing scientific and intellectually-stimulating experiences and discussions for us...

... and, whenever available, is always ready to cuddle, wrestle, play, talk, and just be with the kids.

No doubt, the best dad for my children that I ever could have found.

Our kids are crazy about him.

And he is crazy about them.

What else could I ever ask for?

Happy Father's Day, Dura-Ace, and we will definitely have an incredible breakfast-in-bed for you next Sunday morning.

Is it a Deal, or not?

My brother-in-law called to tell me that today was their neighborhood's yearly (huge) garage sale. He knew that I have been looking for a new kitchen table and I decided to drive by just in case I saw The Perfect Table for sale.

I drove over and left my three younger kids with him while he sat outside his garage selling his things and watching his own four small children. My sister-in-law offered to come with me and show me the best streets to look for sales.

Initially, I felt solid and relaxed, but quickly things unraveled. Actually, it was terrible. Really. There were so many good deals. This was a huge, family (and nice) neighborhood and there were multiple garage sales down every street. I soon felt somewhat frenzied and not at all like myself.

I completely lost sight of my goal.

I bought so many things that I would have been perfectly happy with-out. My car was crammed with cool toys, fancy dinner plates (like the link below, but in a cool orange color), a trike with a handle to push for my 2-year old, an art easel, etc. etc. etc. - I had to leave the larger pieces of furniture in my in-laws' garage.


So, I am now feeling, not only totally embarrassed by my apparently uncontrollable behavior, but completely irresponsible, yet also somewhat innocent, as I truly don't know what came over me.

I could not say no to the deals, even the not-so-good ones. At one point I started racking my brain trying to think of who I knew that could use the things that I had absolutely no use for, but that were a great deal. Even after I finally relieved my brother-in-law from kid duty and was driving home, having way overspent, I felt like I could not physically exit the neighborhood without stopping a few more times. Every street I went down had more (wonderful and luring) garage sales.

I have many friends who love to go to garage sales on Saturdays, and actually do save a lot of money. (This is desirable for me, as a wife of a medical resident and mother of four. Really desirable.) I, however, now know that that will never be the case with me. I will always overspend. I will not save. I will only be able to stop buying the low-priced, used items (particularly those that I don't even need) after I have overindulged, and, it is too late.

When I arrived back at my mother-in-law's and told her about it, she said, "Isn't there a saying like, 'If you didn't need it in the first place, then it wasn't a deal'?"

I laughed. Yep.

Then, later, I told my mom about it. She said, "Oh, that sounds like so much fun!" And it hit me: my mom loves a good deal. Finding deals is a huge stress release for her, so she searches for (and finds) them often. And so, I have decided that this is genetic. Totally genetic. And, therefore, I am innocent. This is my case; hopefully it will lighten the sentence my husband gives me when he discovers not only how much I spent today, but more particularly, what I spent it on.

Kids Studying All Summer Long

A friend gave me this idea - and so far it has worked marvelously, so I thought I'd share. (Hint: this may work best if your kids don't often get new toys, but it still might work well regardless.)

We bought workbooks for our two older kids, (and a sticker book for our 2-year old), and then we explained to them that if they completed their workbooks, we would let them chose any toy they want at the store. (We also said that we would get them additional workbooks if they completed them, and additional toys.)

Seriously, I have never seen my 7-year old son more determined to work diligently on completing a goal, (besides getting to the next level in a video game). During the last four days, he has competed 100 pages. Luckily for me the book is huge and has about 500 pages; but still, I thought it would last him longer than a month! Our daughter, with a typical second child approach to life, has been there right beside him, working determinedly.

It is so nice (this is an understatement) to see them sitting together at the table, working diligently with their workbooks, doing math and reading, or (in my daughter's case) cutting and gluing, or circling or tracing letters and practicing sounds of letters, etc.

Really, it is working almost too well. They work for a while, and then go out to play (in the rain) for what they call "recess." It's been really fun, and hopefully it will keep their minds active, and continue until school starts in the Fall.

Nurturing - or not

The other day, my mother-in-law said she was very impressed by how my 2-year old took care of four little baby dolls. He carefully set them up beside each other on a couch and then lovingly gave them each dishes as he pretended to feed them. She thought, "He is so nurturing!"

Then, today, she heard a banging noise. She followed the noise and found him standing up and repeatedly banging one of the dolls against their wood floor.

Grandma: "What are you doing?"
2-year old: "Hitting the baby on the floor."
Grandma: "Don't you think that will hurt the baby and make it cry?"
2-year old: "No." (More banging)

That takes care of any notion that Grandma might have of our 2-year old being nurturing, or at least in a way we might define it.

When our oldest son was two years old, he was found by his other grandma repeatedly bashing a truck against their cement steps. He then paused, looked up at her, and said, "Good truck, Grandma. Good truck." Seriously, it was as if he was simply testing its durability - and nothing else.

So, it could just be the age, plus I did see our 2-year old sneaking up to give our 10-month old a little kiss this evening, so maybe there is hope for him yet.

Kaboom

It's dinner time. My kids are spread throughout the kitchen and family room, on couches or chairs, eating pizza (with no vegetables) on paper plates, and watching a Disney movie on t.v. past their bedtime. A commercial just came on for Kaboom. A woman was spraying and cleaning her shower. My 2-year old said, "Mommy, this is your movie!"

The move is officially in full swing.

Wanting to be Pregnant?

Yes, that is me, in the middle, waiting in line to receive my graduate diploma (I still had two more months of pregnancy left at the time). I found this picture the other day and have decided that I need to look at it every once in a while. to remember.

Last night I was reading a little story in the Friend magazine to my kids while they laid in bed. It was about a mother and father talking with their two young sons:

"We have wonderful news (the mom said)... Our family is going to have another baby."

I choked through the words, and the sentences that followed. I would love to be able to say those words to my kids again.

What? Am I mad? How could I even ever-so-slightly long to have another baby, despite the fact that I never have time to put makeup on, let alone do my hair, my brain is fried and frazzled all of the time, my house is never clean, my kids take turns crying, since there are so many of them, so there is almost always some one who needs me to comfort them, or to discipline them, since, usually, wrestling or teasing preceded the crying, and I feel like I live inside my minivan - already - and I know that will just get worse. I just can't figure it out. I currently really truly feel like I am past my limit of what I can handle, but still was touched with That Feeling when I read the story last night.

(I will for sure have to censor this post from my husband.)

Sure, it is crazy, insane, chaotic, etc. all the time, but That Feeling, inside, is a sweet, strong desire and understanding of how wonderful it is to have children, and that it is all worth it. I had this feeling before we decided to have our third child. At the time, I told my husband that I felt it strongly. It felt like more than just the normal, natural, ever-present, female instinct to have children. But, almost immediately after I became pregnant, all I could think about was the Impending, Inescapable Labor Experience, and felt that I had somehow been tricked into all of it. (Pregnancy does not bring out my best.) I just could not believe that I had actually wanted to become pregnant again.

But I cannot imagine life without my third, or any of the others. I cannot believe how lucky I am to have them. So, I have to say, maybe That Feeling really is the most wonderful thing in the world.

I think it is.

Would You Volunteer?

Where do they find these volunteers? My son just loved this activity at a pre-school fund-raiser fair last week.

Here is a great site a friend told me about recently: idealist.org. You can find various volunteer opportunities - even ones you can do from home. (!) One example she told me about was volunteering to train refugee mothers that are here in the U.S. and need support and knowledge regarding raising their children here - this position is done via the Internet/e-mail. How cool is that?

Thank You Gifts for Teachers

Because school ends roughly when we move, (and I know things will be crazy the last week of school), I am searching right now for some gift ideas for my kids' teachers. I found some ideas here, and then some here, but actually ended up finding some cute, homemade ideas on this blogspot.

I like the "you are o-fish-ally the best" idea with sweedish fish, or even better, the "you deserve chocolate" idea.