I totally lost it on Saturday.
And the only reason for it (that I can pinpoint) is: stress.
I was in a hurry. I was worried that I wouldn't have enough time to prepare a side dish for a barbeque with friends. I was concerned about whether the baby would last, or rather, not start screaming because he was hungry, until we arrived home. I had been rushing to and from two school fundraisers, a baseball game, the post office, and the grocery store, with all four kids, all by myself, during the previous 24 hours, and I was in a frenzy, to put it lightly. And, to top it all off, my two-year old had barely snuck in a 10-minute (instead of 2-hour) nap during the craziness.
(Plus, we are moving in three weeks, so my stress level is a bit elevated anyways!!)
He wanted to push the grocery cart, by himself, through the parking lot to the car. After ten minutes of attempting to compromise and get him into his car seat, the stressed Liz, not the mother in me, just took over.
So, all that stuff in earlier posts about me having a great ability to handle meltdowns in a sweet, calm, and understanding way - forget I ever wrote any of it.
Maybe if I could eliminate all of the stress in my life, I could be that way all of the time... controlled, kind, patient, nurturing, and sweet... or maybe at least some of the time.
I like the quote by Mother Teresa: "God does not require that I succeed, only that I do what I can." I'm grateful that I get more than three strikes, because, in reality, I can't eliminate stress. I have four kids. My husband is a doctor and is either absent or present-but-sleeping-or-sleepy the majority of the time. And, let's face it, I like to be busy too, so some of it I bring on myself. Maybe that's my lesson to learn - to slow down and enjoy being a mom, rather than try to do everything, and I mean every-thing, so that I can eliminate that "stressed-out-Liz" from taking over again.