Often I have to step back and evaluate whether I am "waiting until [we are] established to begin enjoying [our] life together." (From The Medical Marriage - Sustaining Healthy Relationships for Physicians and Their Families - a lovely little book.) Generally I am a very positive person, definitely a "the-glass-is-half-full" type of person. But, every once in a while, I feel a huge pressure mounting inside and I feel as if I might burst. I thing I start "waiting." When this happens, I have developed a habit of stepping back in order to evaluate the tiny details of my life, my thoughts, the way I treat others, how much I stretch myself to form lasting relationships, my gratitude, my priorities, what I am filling my time with - particularly my spare time, etc.
I do not want to ever be found in "the waiting place." (From Oh, the Places You'll Go!")
Months ago, I read a little commentary: As for Years. The article in based upon a scripture:
"I consecrate unto them this land for a little season, until I, the Lord, shall provide for them otherwise, and command them to go hence; And the hour and the day is not given unto them, wherefore, let them act upon this land as for years, and this shall turn unto them for their good." (D&C 51:16-17)
A study presented in The Medical Marriage showed that "parenting stress involving spouses of male residents and house staff found that 75 percent of staff spouses expected parenting stress to decrease after residency, but 50 percent reported that stress actually increased when their mates ended residency. Only 25 percent stated that the level of stress had remained about the same."
How tragic if I place my hope on assuming that my husband will "be around more later" - that I even allow that thought to enter my mind - rather than just enjoy the times when he is around, and the times when he is not. I agree that "...we are to live in the present." I think that "...the Lord seems to want his people to be prepared... to live in the moment and for eternity..." because the lessons we learn during each experience, big or small, are indispensable and if we rush through it, or hold our heads too high to even notice the moments of the present as we "wait for later," we will miss - a lot.
The phrase "as for years"..."invites us to seize the day, but with an eye toward the future. We are not merely to mark time in this life but... to improve every shining moment, knowing that eternity is composed of such fleeting moments."